|
Written by Kate
|
|
Sunday, 22 October 2006 |
|
Word Count: 595 There are many things to consider before embarking on a divorce. Many of these concern financial and long term goal alterations. What happens with the
home? With retirement funding? What about the children, their welfare, and
future financial needs? Will there be complications with property, assets,
taxes, and liens? Will you hire a lawyer to draw up papers and handle the
negotiating, or will you do most of the work yourself? Do you have a consultant
or good friend to guide you through all this?
WHEW ! Even though the above examples were financial considerations, I’m sure
you agree that each subject will carry with it some form of emotional
difficulty.
Today I want to focus on a separate angle of emotional consideration before the
divorce is made (if possible). This affects whether or not you need and want to
still divorce. It also influences your future relationships regardless with whom
you connect. The subject that truly must be addressed is: Emotional Healing.
Hey ! Everybody wants a great relationship – right? Well, the more we have
stored up in the way of unfinished or unspoken emotions and business – the more
we are unavailable and incapable to truly connect, find satisfaction, and
experience fulfillment within our connections with other people.
As you know most divorces are built on walls of negative emotions such as (years
of) pain, frustration, anger, resentment, jealousy, guilt, and
misunderstandings. Living with unresolved emotions like these is like knowing
you have toxic waste inside your body and knowing you can clear it out -- so DO
IT ! : -) There are several options for accomplishing your emotional healing: a
few follow.
Therapy can be fantastic for many people. The talking and sharing bring about
new understandings over a period of time. This approach has worked for years.
Check your local listings, ask questions, find the style and technique that will
work for you. Coaching is a newer option that some choose. In coaching,
individuals are given assignments which will uncover what is truly at the core,
help them get honest, and make decisions from an authentic place. Spiritual
counseling is another avenue that can help reframe the issues within a couple’s
own context of who they are at a deeper level and by the principles through
which they have committed to align their lives. Finally, there are also
seminars, retreats and at-home retreat packages that raise issues, guide you to
a clearer understanding of yourself, help you take ownership, allow you to move
forward with more integrity and in emotional freedom.
Which ever path suits you best, I encourage you to investigate that option and
engage yourself within it before cutting ties and believing that once the papers
are done and signed life will just pick up afresh and anew. Give yourself the
best gift of all: a clean heart and a freedom you may not have experienced in
years. This way, whether you divorce or not you will be truly able to again feel
satisfied and connected when relating to the one you love.
Until next time--- all the best,
Kate
Kate Hufstetler is a life coach and curriculum designer. Her clients come from
both the United States and overseas. She offers coaching services via email and
phone consultations. Her new product and service line is a unique offer of
at-home retreat packages. The retreats can be done as a seminar or group
retreat, but they are designed specifically for those who can’t get away.
http://www.comedreamwithme.com
|